You're Really Roaming the Playgrounds of Lower Thinking Pal!

Hello kids! Today in class we're going to discuss the meaning of the phrases: Inappropriate Button... say it with me - Inappropriate Button! (it's best to say with a really bad British accent) and our other phrase we will be discussing is Social Filter.... can you all say that one - Social Filter? Good Work!

Okay, enough of that! So I grew up in a little po-dunk town called Virden in the province of Manitoba. Now Virden seems like a really nice, quaint, simple little town to someone who hasn't stayed there longer than a few hours. This, however, is not the case. This sweet, clean town is in fact a facade, a hoax, a ruse if you will. Virden has the highest rate of teenage pregnancies per capita in Canada (or so I'm told, but I believe it). I have no idea why our little town would have more than other towns in Manitoba, my reasoning is just that there really isn't anything better to do there....
But this sort of reputation has many drawbacks and side effects attached to such a lucrative title. You see if you grow up in a town whose only other claim to fame is bad water, you tend to start developing certain attitudes and habits that you may not have had growing up in a different place.
One for example, is thinking and saying very innappropriate things. I quite often struggle with this because usually it's the wrong thing to say that pops into my head first. Thankfully most of my close friends realize and expect this from me, and I'm given much grace for my socially outcast upbringing.
Fortunately I'm not the only one who grew up in the Virden area who struggles with saying things that they shouldn't. I have a friend named Andrew (or Uncle Clarence) who tends to always say the wrong thing at the wrong time. Case in point: telling me I had a nice rack at a super bad time. He really doesn't mean to do it, and you know that usually he is trying to say something else, but it just always comes out wrong.
For Andrew's little problem we developed something called the 'Inappropriate Button'. It's actually an invisible button that we press when Andrew should've stopped talking a few sentences ago. It has since been used on many more people then just Andrew and has always proved effective.
When I moved to Brandon I discovered a variation on the infamous button called the 'Social Filter' which was used mostly for an old friend who incidentally used to spend a lot of time in Virden named Thomas. In this variation when Thomas (like Andrew) should've stopped talking long ago people would simply yell "SOCIAL FILTER". It also proved quite effective.
So this is my universal apology to you, from all the people who have been corrupted by my little home town. I'm so very sorry! And if you ever hear me mutter something under my breath that sounds like 'wow, I wish I wasn't from Virden' you will know why, I've done the smart thing and not let whatever was swirling around in my mind come blasting forth through my mouth.

Class dismissed!

If I Could Go Back in Time I'd Wanna Meet Snoopy!

I've come to a very important conclusion today... Melanie from Josie and the Pussycats = Sarah K. .... 'nuff said!!!

If any of you who are reading this (assuming people read this) have already read Terrin and Brett's blogs you'll have heard about our "incident" last weekend in Winnipeg. Oh the times... I'm not gonna rehash what happened, Terrin and Brett's accounts of the tale are pretty accurate, except for Terrin thinking I peed when I laughed, I just teared up a lot, nothing else! I swear!
Anyways... CPC's special ensemble has inspired me... or more accuratlely Jana rocking out out on the congas and djembe has inspired me. It's true! I now want a djembe, I have no idea how to play it, but that's not what is important, what is important is that I want one. (I have been known to get pretty impulsive as well)
So I have decided to jusify my impulsiveness with my birthday, most girls can understand this, and to guys, yes... girls do this! So now I'm allowed to be stupid and impulsive with my money under the guise of treating myself for my birthday.
MWHAHAHAHAAAAA....
On a side note...
Terrin's fear of hand puppets is rather entertaining...
I love being a groupie!
I'm very sad I missed the cowbell event.
Pleasurable can be used in a not good, or wholesome way...
And people should ask me about Curly the Screeching Ear Phenomenon, and why she is an important figure in history....
speaking of figures... Terrin, you have no hips (in reference to your cowbell blog)

Okay, tune in next time for I'm sure I can come up with something half entertaining to read....
G'night!

I'm Swearing Off All Men.... and Carbohydrates.

Okay.... so I am presently on a romantic sabbatical. It's just something I thought I needed to do because I am completely disgusted with people who date other people just because they are lonely. They don't really like that person, or love that person, they have however convinced themselves that this other person is "the one" because of lack of other options as opposed to actually caring for them. I have been faced with this pathetic display of infactuation in my one of my current groups of friends. The thing that is even worse though is that they ask me for advice... which usually I don't mind giving. But it's when they argue with me when I say that I can't see them togther that I feel like slamming their head into a wall and telling them it's an improvement. "Uh, gee Becca, why don't you think me and Penelope should go out?" Because you are a lazy, ignorant, shallow, and fickle individual who doesn't deserve her, so BACK OFF!!!!!
Or another person may ask, "I've been flirting with her for months, why won't she go out with me?" Because you are a doofus and she has been leading you on, she doesn't want you, she wants the attention, she doesn't care who gives it to her!
Another reason for my present sabbatical is not understanding the mentality of a former couple remaining friends after a bad breakup. Why continue the pain and agony in disguise of a friendship. In all honesty, I will want all your future relationships to crash and burn to prove that I wasn't the problem in our relationship, and you will ultimately detest any of my future boyfriends because they are now getting the attention that you used to adore. So really, why do we do this to ourselves? Well my dear friend Brodie has a theory, it's called the Tarzan theory. Basically the imagery that encompasses the theory is that of Tarzan trying to swing from vine to vine but is incapable because he is unable to let go of his previous vine and put all his weight on his new vine for fear of the new vine breaking. I can see this being especially the case for those people who were left heartbroken, they don't want to grasp on to another vine for fear of it leaving them just as hurt. Perhaps the heartbreaker clings to both vines for fear that the grass on the other side is not as green as they had first thought. Whatever the case I think it is odd for a recent ex to all of a sudden request for his new girlfriend and himself to spend time time with you and your group of friends. Is this the Tarzan theory, is it sabotage, is it social ineptness and naivety at it's worst? I don't understand this particular individual I'm afraid he will remain an enigma in the worst sort of way. Grrrr....
So then I ask myself, why do I care, do I really want to see a relationship crash and burn, do I really want to show grace and be friends, do I just keep communication lines open because I can't handle not knowing how his twisted mind functions, or lack thereof?
Perhaps questions for another day...
On a side note I have cut back on carbs and I have lost 15 pounds! Yay me!!!!
Til next time chillun'
Buh-bye

Mini! 

Dude, Where's Your Car?

Have you ever heard Adam Sandler's song 'piece of s*%@ car'? If you have, then you have an idea what my car is like. Oh yes, it's true! It makes me sad actually that I can list more things that my car CAN'T do as opposed to what it CAN do.
I drive a '92 Cavalier, it's not that bad of a make I suppose, my specific car just needs a lot of work. You see those simple things that people take for granted in a car are the simple things that my car lacks. I have no cruise control, no horn, no interior light, no smoke outlet to plug in a cell phone (oh it's there, it just doesn't work!). My hood release doens't work, Leroy had to build a makeshift one out in front of my car. My trunk is the only thing that locks, and my heater fan makes a funny rumbling noise under my hood. I also don't have a face plate on my stereo system because the morons who stole it didn't realize that they need the entire bloody stereo!!! So the face plate is useless to them and the stupid stereo is useless to me. I mean really! If you are gonna steal something, be smart about it.
Some of my friends have also enjoyed the fact that my licence plate starts with DRK, it would only have been better if it would've started with EVL.
My dream car at the moment is a Mini Cooper. It's nice! www.mini.ca - check it out!
Alas... I have to put up with my car at least for another couple of years until I can afford my mini...
Sigh!
See you next time on Becca's Blog!